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Insanity runs...

it doesn't walk.  

It runs.

(sometimes it rides a bike and/or swims)

I keep simplifying my life only to complicate it.

I take on bigger problems, because little ones only require small solutions.  

Big issues make change necessary and change is.... change is good.

 A month of preparation and yet I was still not completely ready for yesterday's move.  Lucky for me I was again blessed with good natured movers.   I had thought of everything,  just not of everything ELSE.  I had cake pans, but no flour to bake a cake.  Coffee pot, filters and no coffee.  Lamps and no bulbs.

Moving should be/could-very-well-be the new Purgatory.  

As night fell, I pushed two twin mattresses together on the floor and made a big bed for boy and girl and I to sleep in together.  Me in the middle.   At 7:45 pm, we were tuckered and tucked in.  The house felt cold.  Through the curtainless windows, the sky appeared extra, super-duper dark.  Fog set in.  Wind in the pines is a lovely sound.  The furnace seems to be finicky.  Girl was boiling hot with one of those sudden childhood fevers.   Sleeping Boy had a 1/2 inch of dirt beneath his fingernails from happily, productively raking race tracks in the mud most of the day.  Dogs were restless.  Their claws kept tapping on the metal, spiral staircase.   They want to come up, but are afraid to go down.  How I know that feeling.

First night in this new weekend-y home.  It's odd, it's beautiful, it's different, it's sooo different, it's scary, it's peaceful, it's making me crazy, in other words - it's perfect.  

If I questioned everything I question in my life, I'd always be answering and never questioning.

I fell through the cracks of our make shift bed several times last night.  I got up so often, I think I rose more then I slept.  It was still one of the most incredible "rests" of my life.  I'll remember it for the rest of my life.

I am so shockingly familiar with this same sort of feeling, way back from when I was a kid.  This happy, what the hell is happening, how cool is this and just plain "oh my gosh" kind of feeling.  A direct result of my parent making changes, going out on a limb to take ordinary and make it extraordinary. 

Is this necessary?   Is this what it takes? 

Maybe I'm just nuts to think that this is what I should/could do to make things perfect for them, for us.

 And if so,

then here is proof, 

 insanity runs, it doesn't walk, it runs in the family